The Cost of Cyber-Begging is Too High

Posted on January 7 2012 by Imogen Gwynne

The Cost of Cyber-Begging is Too High

Hi Erica,

I saw the craziest thing yesterday. I have a Facebook friend who wrote this status update: “Aint too proud to beg! I have $4,000 in cc debt and no job. I don’t want to go bankrupt, so if you have anything to spare, please PayPal me. Pay it forward and I will do the same one day! God bless!!” She has more than 1,000 friends, and, if everyone gave her a few bucks, she’d pay off everything. I don’t think I have the guts to do it myself, and I owe a lot more than she does. What do you think of this? Gillian

Dear Gillian,

The next chapter from this fascinating cyber-begging story is missing how did her “friends” respond to such pitiful pleas?

Maybe I’m associated with a more hardhearted and judgmental bunch, but I believe if I were to post this type of note, the response from those in my network would be rather scathing. And I’ve got to say I’d be similarly annoyed and not terribly empathetic if one of my Facebook pals did the same. “You bought the stuff or mismanaged your money and credit,” I’d mutter under my breath. “Now you deal with the consequences of your actions.”

Actually, social media sites are just one way cash-strapped people are panhandling on the Internet for their problematic balances. Entire websites can be set up for cyber-begging, and they offer explicit instructions on how to do it effectively. In fact, with just a little digging, I unearthed a woman named Karyn, who created a site to solicit donations to go toward her $20,000 credit card bill. It paid off thanks to the generous donations of friends and strangers, she was debt-free in four months. This savvy (some say brazen) woman even turned her experience into a successful book.

Though I gave you my opinion on this practice (not good), I wanted to get additional feedback. Naturally I turned to Facebook itself. I polled everyone in my public network to find out what they think of the practice of stretching out a virtual hand.

The reaction was just as I suspected. It’s acceptable to request donations to support a reputable cause or to help cover the cost of extreme medical procedures. Someone mentioned cancer treatments, which certainly can be hideously expensive.

Fundraising is acceptable, responded one friend. But reducing someone else’s credit card balances? Get to work, she says. “I personally have held multiple unsavory jobs to both support myself and pay debt, and thats what I would recommend, she says.

Another friend retorted, “Pay down debt!?! Heck no. Weve all been there and when you have to dig yourself out, you are more likely to not make the same mistakes twice.” More than a few said they’d immediately unfriend the beggar.

So while there’s nothing illegal about soliciting cash from loved ones and strangers to delete credit card debt, you do run the risk of alienating people. You’ll be forevermore known as the person who abandoned pride and reputation just to pay off some bills. To me, that’s not a great trade-off. It’s really a matter of what you’re comfortable with, however. There is no one right answer its credit etiquette relativism.

Finally, if you’re wondering if there’s a tax issue to this unconventional solution, the answer is that there probably wouldn’t be. Unless the financial present is greater than $13,000 (the current gift tax limit), the recipient need not report the donation to the IRS.

Search For Credit Cards